What We Go Through to Get Sober and Clean

I am often asked how long will this feeling last? We go through stages when we get sober and clean.

The first stage: Denial…”I am not an alcoholic.” Who wants to admit this? You mean I can never have a drink or my drug again? This lasts for a while, we may even relapse a few time to prove to ourselves that we can handle social drinking or one glass of wine. Always to end up back at the same place. “I have a problem.”

The second stage: Anger… “Darn it, I can’t just drink one drink, I end up getting drunk. I don’t want to be a drug addict or alcoholic. I am really  mad that I cannot drink.” This stage will pass if we go to 90 meetings in 90 days and share at each meeting about this anger.

The third stage: Bargaining… ” OK, God. If you would please help me get sober, I will go church.” At this point, we are really starting to realize we have a challenge on our hands. 

The forth stage: Depression…” I am doomed to a boring life of no drugs and alcohol.” I am so sad at this stage that I see little hope in the future.

The fifth stage: Acceptance… “It’s OK to be an alcoholic, in fact, I am a grateful alcoholic.” Wow this is surrendering to the reality it is what it is. I stop fighting. I relax and let go and let God.

These are the stages of loss written by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross.

Remember, the last resentment we have to deal with is the resentment that we are an alcoholic or drug addict. 

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